Life With PH, PH Fashion

Finally, our Winner!

I am SO thankful for all the lovely ladies that entered their nails into the competition! Candice and I are nail freaks so it was awesome to see all the designs and what not. So, since we loved these designs and were so indecisive, there was a tie. The first winner wins the shirt and beauty products and we are sending our second winner a shirt! Woo-hoo! 

Our first winner was the lovely Elizabeth from England!! She instantly entered the competition and continued to spread the awareness on her Instagram. Her designs on all of her nails were crazy cool and artistic!! You can find her on Instagram as elizabethlacquer. Thank you so much Elizabeth for spreading awareness in England! Enjoy your prize package and shirt! 🙂


Our second winner was the lovely Sydney Carlo! The sequin look on your thumb, purple and Zebra were all super cute! Seriously, we loved them. I will contact you so we can send you your shirt. Thank you so much for entering and spreading awareness! 🙂



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Life With PH, PH Fashion

Wrapping Up the Contest!

Hello lovelies! Sorry its been a little while, but school has started and I’m back to exhaustion! Its been really really REALLY tough week for so many reasons. However, the song of the week (Al Green’s Lets Stay Together) is keeping me sane. But moving on, this is a short little post to remind you that THIS FRIDAY (August 30th) a PH manicure winner will be chosen!! 🙂 How exciting! So get your entries in AS SOON AS POSSIBLE at the chance to win! Get creative and have fun with it! I’m posting pictures below of the entries I’ve gotten so far. Thank y’all so much for showing off your awesome manicures (and toes) and showing support and awareness for this disease. Y’all are awesome.

photo(7)Elizabeth from England


Heather Bielawski


Sydney Carlo


Kayla Nicole from Boston Massachusetts


Shanon Moncrief


Jody Miller



Life With PH

Destroying Myself

I hope y’alls week has been good so far. This has been a highly emotional week for me because of changes in my personal life. It’s all just overwhelming but its life. Just letting y’all know that you have only TEN DAYS LEFT IN THE NAIL COMPETITION. Pleeeeeease enter so you have a chance to win a Just Breathe shirt and beauty prize pack! We have very few entries so at least try. 🙂


Moving onto a more serious subject, I’ve been thinking about personal relationships lately. What they mean to us as a patient and more importantly the other person that has to “deal” with us. I’m 21 years old so a lot of dating questions get thrown my way everyday. Your boyfriend must do this, you would be so cute with this person, how is dating going…blah blah blah. I’ve been single for a while now because I can just honestly say I’m picky and who wouldn’t be with what I have to deal with? The last person I dated knew me pre-diagnosis then had to “accept” me during and after my disease. He didn’t do well with the accepting part and that’s an understatement. My disease was weight on my shoulders and was something that clouded his thinking. Pulmonary Hypertension was parked right in the middle of our relationship. This wasn’t by choice but instead because of coping and I knew he didn’t accept me so why should I accept myself? He hated what my body and life was becoming and I could sense it. The relationship crumbled along with my mental status. What a gem he was…hahaha.

Now here I sit with Rocco at my side and a list on my bulletin board of everything I want in a man. I’m patiently waiting and hoping that someone out there maybe, just maybe will be able to accept me. And then it hit…I’m 21 years old. There is no one my age who needs or want someone like me. I am an old lady trapped in a young persons body. I am not concerned with parties, doing whatever I want, living with whoever I want, drugs and random guys. I dont have the physical, mental or moral energy and time for that. I’ve got to balance medical bills, insurance, money for college and my actual health. I can’t just look for any guy, I’ve got to look for someone who is chasing a great future because its going to take his and my salary to keep me alive. I’ve got to look for someone who is ok with my medical bills that have piled up and overall what my body is about to become. I will deteriorate and fall apart one day which is something I’m prepared for but Lord knows what he could think. Bottom line, I don’t blame people my age not finding my life style attractive, they deserve a young person. It hurts, not going to lie but its the truth.

But how do people and PH balance in a relationship? Well, from what I’ve observed and a few experiences here and there, PH is never the rock in the relationship. When you give a disease all the attention, the relationship will crumble under that light. There will be times when you need to vent about certain things, there will be times for doctor appointments and procedures and that’s all the time it should get. What if this is a new thing and they still have no clue about your disease or its limitations? This is never a “first date” conversation because that just sends people running. It’s not a second or a third date conversation either or an out of the blue conversation. This is a “when something comes up” conversation that could somehow play into your disease. A guy and I had been talking for almost a week and knew each other quite well except for this one big detail. He asked one night if I played any sports in high school and I calmly mentioned my disease, its limitations and I wasn’t able to play sports. immediately, he was overwhelmed by the info and wanted to know more so I very very very simply explained what PH is, what I do for it and how it affects my future. He didn’t get all the intimate details but he got the outlines for sure. I kept it SIMPLE, and that is key. From then on unless things got super serious he wouldve never known the intimate details, he wouldve only heard about my disease unless I landed myself in the hospital or something. Thats it…if he accepts it he does and if he doesn’t, well then that’s your answer with him.

I’m always so negative about this relationship stuff well because I’ve had nothing but negative guys. It sucks, its reality and I’ve tried and tried to improve myself. Sometimes I turn it back on me which strikes up an insecurity mindset that I’m battling but it’s not an easy cycle…people destroy you which you learn from. Then you start to destroy yourself.


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Enjoy the new song of the week! Disco Lady by Johnnie Taylor! The smooth sounds are relaxing and fun all at the same time.

Life With PH

Spa Day Y’all!

Happy Saturday y’all! I’m trying to keep my head up by staying busy and you should as well! So I’ve been scanning my email (trying to catch up) and I received another contest entry from the lovely Heather! She did her nails AND toes! How cute are those?! photo(10)

You have ONLY 13 days left to submit your nails to win this prize package! This shouldn’t just be a contest, this should be a relaxing spa day for you to enjoy yourself and relax. I had a spa day with my best friend a couple of days ago and it was highly needed. What exactly do you need for your spa day? Well, lets see…


You don’t need complete peace and quiet (unless that suits you because I can’t stand it!) so I usually keep my brain and thoughts busy with a show or music. I’m in a Grey’s Anatomy phase (who doesn’t enjoy looking at Mcdreamy’s face?!). This usually helps me relax and forget about my world so I can focus on their awesome world.



I have no idea how we ended up with one but I love it. Seriously, I can do my own at home pedicure without paying someone $30 when I can’t shuffle out the money. These are awesome! You can find them at Walmart for around $30-40 dollars. It’s worth it to soak your feet when you want to at home.



This is one of the contest prizes and it is seriously amazing. You can use this on anything! I use to wash my hands from time to time, clean my makeup brushes and the other night I put a little in my foot spa! IT WAS AMAZING. It makes the water look like milk and it smells great!! Also, when you turn the bubbles on, the soap DOESN’T bubble and go everywhere!! It made my feet so fresh and also after taking off the dead skin and walking around all day the next day my feet didn’t go back to looking white, dry and crusty again! You have a chance to win this stuff and its AMAZING.



So this is my favorite one because its safe, easy and you don’t risk taking a chunk of skin off your heel. Revlon’s is the best! It works quite literally like a kitchen grater, you just slide it over your heel (it feels great) and it takes the excess skin off. Bonus? You can remove the head and empty your yucky dead skin out. This is the best and safest shaver out there! After you’re done using it use your Dr. Bronners Magic Soap to clean it! 😉



This is of course necessary to prep your nails for polish. You can find LEGIT nail files that will actually get the job done at Ulta and (my favorite) Sally’s. Also, don’t forget the importance of a buffer! You need that to buff your nail, take the junk off and the yellowing or staining.



I’m so obsessed with masks! They make my skin feel great. You can find them everywhere in little sample packets or in actual tubes to buy. My favorite right now is the Mint Julep mask which can be found at Walmart!



Obviously you’ll need some awesome nail polish and stripers to paint those babies up especially for the contest!! 🙂 Also, check out your awesome prizes that you could receive if you do win. Remember, we ship around the world. Relax and have a great weekends/spa day loves.



Life With PH

Becoming Weightless

So as y’all know I took a short break from blogging and I’ve realized that in a way this blog is what I come running to as far as keeping my sanity.
Lately I’ve been wanting a family of my own so badly to the point I feel as though I’m losing my mind. People tell me I’m crazy and I’m too young, and yes I may be young but I’m not crazy. Having my own family is not only a dream but its something I know I’m meant for. I’m already making plans for my children that don’t even exist yet because I want the best possible future and life for them. It’s definitely a passion that even thinking about makes me happy. But where did it start? Why in the world would someone my age want to raise children, be around children, start planning children and what not? It’s not just a happy side effect from sex, it’s literally about having the crazy miniature person that will eventually turn into an adult that I crave. I want my family, I want my child and I just want a chance at a happy life.

We all have families or at least people in our families that drive us insane. We joke about it around the holidays, we make sure people know what we’re about to be dealing with and it’s a form of bonding I guess. But to me it’s a lot more than just a joke. For some people that’s their lifestyle and it’s a struggle on top of an already life contaminating disease. Everyday is a PHight for people who have a disease. We have to wake up in the morning, gather the energy to stumble around (hopefully not pass out) and actually piece ourselves together for the real world. It sucks but it’s reality. Some of our situations are easier than others as well. I take around 10 pills a day while some are changing and cleaning a chest tube…others are waiting on a transplant. Our lives are beyond difficult. We deal with anger, attempting to be patient, stress from medical bills all the way to appointments and just plain exhaustion whether its physical or mental. We have issues, we know we have issues but we don’t need to be reminded of being an issue.
Relationships are an intricate task of balancing happiness and being realistic. Some of us can find that true happiness in those around us and it’s that part of us the becomes dependent. Their happiness is ours. Some relationships around us however are unhealthy, exhausting and send us into emotional turmoil. And what do we do when that’s family? Distance is your best friend in this situation. You can’t really ban them from your life and send them away forever. They’re woven into your genes, family events and functions. But you don’t always have to pick up the phone, attend or talk. Sometimes the cure for a bad relationship is barely one at all because in the end, what else do you need on top of this mountain of crap? And you, the family that can’t accept, be nice, play nice, screams, yells, calls us inconsiderate pieces of shit, reminds us of our faults and how terrible we are…man. I hope you know how strong you make us. Because you try to weigh us down when we already have so much else to carry. You will not succeed anymore, I am weightless.


Am I perfect? Oh hell no. Am I a golden child? Never will be. I know my faults, I accept them. But I don’t need to constantly have them thrown my way. I do my best to move forward. I love people, my cats, my life in most ways and when it sucks I don’t need someone there to remind me I do. I cannot wait to have my children to support, encourage and enlighten them. It will be difficult, it will be the hardest job I’ve ever been given but I can already see how 100% worth it it’ll be. They will already have so much weight from so many other things in life, so why add more… like you’re doing?


Life With PH

Just Give Me Room to Breathe

So after a lot of bumps in the road, thoughts and sleepless nights I’ve just finally made a decision.

This blog means the world to me, as well as y’all. But for now I’m stepping away because I am in no place to be writing. I have a lot of issues to get past at the moment that seem to be escalating, and I am grabbing at nothing at the hopes that y’all will stay interested and keep reading. I have no topics, no encouraging words because I am the prime example right now of hitting rock bottom with a disease. And let me tell ya, I’ve hit it. I just feel weird trying to offer words of wisdom when I cant even see them or find them right now because I’m so covered up in whats wrong with me. I hope y’all will be understanding because I cant find it anywhere. Also, Happy almost Birthday (August 12 to be exact) to my amazing brother, John. Love you so much, you are an amazing best friend and brother. Truly my other half.


Lord knows how long the break will be, maybe a week…maybe a month. HOWEVER, The contest is STILL going, I will STILL be checking my email and there WILL be a winner. Thank y’all for reading and stay tuned. I’m off to find my sanity. Thank you for all the kind words, emails and what not. Y’all mean the world to me.


PH Health

Travel Tuesday Y’all!

Happy Travel Tuesday y’all! I am in the mountains again (I know) and trying to just relax and take it all in. I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to get out of your rut, in fact I think I’ve posted about this before.


By the time summer roles around every year, I’m squirming to get away to the point I drive my friends crazy. When you’re locked up in the same schedule, same faces, same places… life can become pretty unbearable. I can’t imagine not having a break! However, I’m a very routine person who hates change. Seriously, it’s very hard for me to adjust, but I definitely need my one (or two) getaways so I can maintain my sanity and also my health.


ALL THE TIME I’m writing about mental health on this blog because its SO important and SO overlooked. PH patients are caught up in caring for our physical bodies to the point that we forget about our emotional and mental health which is sad. You should not just be worrying about your body that you exist in but YOU. When you are stuck in your house, routine and job you quickly sink down into it losing your “charge” on life. There is so much more out there than you’re front lawn or desk. Come on people! It doesn’t have to be the Bahamas but a simple vacation to change things up and recharge. You know what’s good for your health (I honestly don’t recommend talking to doctors because they think you should exist in a bubble) but you know what YOU can do, how you’re feeling, what precautions you need to take and what you should pack. (See my blog post on that) It’s time to recharge lovelies and live your life!! I don’t let anything stop me, not even high elevation. 😉 Have a wonderful rest of your week! ALSO,
check out our entry from Elizabeth in England on our PH manicure competition! She did an AMAZING job




Life With PH

Manicure Monday

Happy Monday loves! So we have a NEW CONTEST posted under the contest tab! We all know that nail designs are all the rage right now. We can put anything we want on them, they are a representation of our fashion, style, tastes and US. So why not represent PH Awareness on your nails at least once?! Exactly. I’ve done it before and so have many others. So therefore, I want to see a picture of your PH Awareness manicure! What should it have on it? Whatever you want. Purple, zebra, lungs, awareness ribbons, etc… It doesn’t matter! But it should clearly be a representation of this disease! Send your mani to   The winner will be chosen August 30th, 2013. I will be deciding a winner and we will have a guest judge, the fabulous Nail Guru Candice Lee! This girl knows whats good for your nails, what polish to choose, designs and how to even do fake nails at home. She’s great and she’s also my  best friend so I knew she’d be perfect for this. What will the winner receive? A Just Breathe shirt, Dr. Bronner’s Magic Organic Soap in the perfect PH color (See what I use it for at the bottom of this post and how AMAZING this stuff is) , a Que Bella Lavender Mask and a PH color Polish (Lacey Lavender by Xtreme)!  There are lots to win here folks and perfect for a beauty day at home. 🙂 Check out more info BELOW!


photo(5)What I use Dr. Bronner’s Magic Soap for! SO AMAZING!

candice1Our guest judge, Candice Lee.

Survivor Sunday

Survivor Sunday: Nicole Northrop

Happy Survivor Sunday y’all! 🙂

Nicole Northrop was born what they thought was a healthy baby girl, 4 weeks premature at 4lbs and 13oz. This was her moms first and only child, so she didn’t question the doctor when they kept saying that Nicole was absolutely fine despite her “always sick” conditions. Around 2 1/2 years old, Doctors started showing some concern about how they thought Nicole wasn’t speaking right. She was soon enrolled in daycare to hopefully help with that development but instead became even more ill with strep and pneumonia which landed her in the hospital. She was treated, diagnosed with asthma and sent on her way around 6 years old. Nicole bravely started kindergarten but missed over 30 days of school due to continued illness. She finally had upper GI tract testing done as well as an X-Ray to explore a cause for her lack of weight gain. An Echocardiogram was performed as well but came back normal. Nicole’s mother, Jane continued to trust the doctors. However, when Nicole’s fingernails started turning purple it raised Jane’s concerned even more. Instead her daughter was diagnosed with general anxiety, ADD, OCD and was put on Zoloft. The medication did help but Nicole continued to suffer from blue lips as well as fingernails, shortness of breath and just struggling to play as a child. Finally, January 21, 2010 Nicole was taken to a pediatrician and Jane began to explain what her daughter had been dealing with all these years. The doctor quickly put a pulse oximeter on her finger (that’s what got them to believe me Miss Nicole!!) and received a reading of 79%! He couldn’t believe it and tried a different machine that gave him a reading of 83%. Nicole was immediately referred to a cardiologist.
The following day at 15 years old, Nicole was finally diagnosed with Severe Pulmonary Hypertension, two smaller holes in her heart and Eisenmenger Syndrome. The same year as me Nicole!! 😉 In February after a right heart cath she began treatment of Sildenafil and oxygen. Oh my goodness Miss Nicole! You have been through so much (which I’m sure you hear all the time) but this disease is not for the weak at all. There is a reason you are still alive so appreciate yourself! Seriously. PH can get ridiculous but it’s our job as strong people to pick ourselves up and keep moving. You are doing great so far or you wouldn’t still be here. You are PHabulous!! 🙂
Jane, you are a PHenomenal mother as well! Thank you so much for entering the Survivor Sunday contest and being featured. Enjoy your Just Breathe T-shirts!! 🙂

“I try to stay positive if for no other reason than for my daughter. I will always be here for my daughter and will do anything that I can for her. If she needs to live with us for the rest of her life, that’s okay. If she can’t work, that’s okay. Whatever is in store for her future I am right there with her.”


PH Fashion

Fashion Friday Continued: Oh Happy Day!

So I’m having to make ANOTHER post because yesterday exploded with amazing things! First of all, the Mind Over Matter shirts are officially ready for those of you who ordered!! 🙂 This company is amazing to work with, the shirts look incredible and I am just so happy that I cant put into words. I will let you know when I ship your packages! I am scrambling because I leave town tomorrow loves and I will not get back into town until Thursday!


And Second! The Pulmonary Hypertension Association landed themselves in this months People Stylewatch on page 187 under Charity Finds!! This is a huge step and I think fits perfect with Fashion Friday! You can purchase this amazing tote at    Seriously y’all, its just amazing. Its your job to get this disease known, so keep spreading the word and do what you can! Have a lovely saturday.



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